HOT SAUCE RECAPS

Survivor

It was a cultural milestone. Take some people, dump them in a place they can walk around in a state of undress most of the time, and see who will be the last one standing. We bailed shortly before things became a parade of gimmicks.

American Idol

Let America pick the next musical superstar and what do you get? Fraus and bitter hags voting for the ugliest white male contestants galore, while calling beautiful female ones all kinds of synonyms for prostitutes. We couldn't flee fast enough.

The Amazing Race

We enjoyed this show a lot... until they started dumbing it down due to cost and logistics reasons, and began bringing on very annoying contestants that stink up the joint with tedious drama. We have to cancel the trip ASAP.

The Apprentice: Martha Stewart

We really like this one, it's much better than Donald Trumps's, but of course nobody else does. It was cancelled after a season, but we will always have the memories of Martha Stewart, her daughter, Bethenny, and Crazy Jim.

Project Runway

Two seasons were all it took before we became fed up with the manufactured drama, eliminations tailored for controversy and story line purposes, and the predictable one person in the final three that is just not worthy.

Unan1mous

This one has an intriguing premise straight out of a Saw-like film, but it went downhill fast. Real fast. We knew there would be trouble when the host turned out to be that dork that hosted the kiddie game show Fun House.