Bride For The Night
by Patti Berg, contemporary (2000)
Avon, $5.99, ISBN 0-380-80736-X

Bride For The Night is basically Big Misunderstandings piled upon Big Misunderstandings. It is a story that would be only about a quarter of its (large print) 374 pages if the stupid, insecure, irritating heroine Cairo McKnight has just sit down and for once make up her freaking mind to actually talk to the hero.

Once, when she was 18 and Duncan Kincaid was - Is he 22? I'm not sure and you can bet that I don't want to reread this story to be sure - younger they eloped and had a Honeymoon night. Then he left her for some high adventure digging dead bodies (he's an archeologist looking for a mythical city).

Some breakdown of communication occurs and she doesn't respond to his letters. When he calls her from a jail, she files for annulment. Case closed.

Now, five years down the road, they meet again. She now gives tourists some sort of semi-authentic archeology tours and a few months back she allowed a drunk pilot to carry her customers and got them all killed. She's now guilt-ridden. She's also badly in need of money (gee, surprise), and she has advertised that her next tour would be led by flashy, dashing Indiana-Jones-lookalike Duncan Kincaid. So here she is, asking Duncan to help her.

Of course, there's also another reason. Since this is a contemporary, a baby has to figure in somewhere. Or rather, a child. Shall Cairo tell Duncan about their (genius, of course) son?

Of course she can't. Whenever she is about to tell him, some reason would come up. First he is irresponsible. Then he kisses her and hence she forgets to tell him. Then she hears him argue with her and in spite she refuses to tell him then. And on and on until the predictable big blow up occurs.

After a while I am pulling my hair and stamping my feet and screaming at Cairo myself, "Tell him! Tell him! For God's sake, JUST TELL HIM! TELL HIIIIMM!!!" Oh, the misery!

I feel so used, manipulated, and insulted by such blatantly predictable story that seems to be nothing more than Romance Clichés For Beginners.

Rating: 29

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